Compliments permitted?

A few days ago, I was standing in front of our bank tower, chatting, when a colleague walked by and greeted me. Besides the usual questions about how I was, he did something that felt really good for me. He said I was wearing a beautiful dress and that it looked great on me. Aside from the fact that I don't know how to handle such compliments and still have to get used to them—just like constantly being given priority by colleagues (e.g., at the elevator) — I thought it was really nice.

Why did that feel so good to me? Because for me, it represented acceptance. Not silent acceptance or tolerance. No one has to like what I do or applaud it — not making a face is completely sufficient. But my colleague didn't even need to bring it up, which made it feel honest and appreciative to me.

Personally, I think it's a shame that such compliments, especially in a professional setting, are rarely given these days, for fear of behaving improperly. The discussion, which I consider excessive, ranges from overstepping boundaries to the argument about someone's right to judge another person's appearance or clothing choices. Everyone does exactly that hundreds of times a day, we just don't say it out loud. For me, it's simply a matter of the situation and the way it's said.

Of course, there are compliments that aren't really appropriate in a professional setting. In my opinion, it's a different story whether a friend tells me something about my legs or a colleague does. And that's exactly where the difference lies for me: An honest, respectful compliment can be a little pick-me-up at the right moment – without any ulterior motive, simply as a sign of appreciation.

So, the next time you think, "That outfit suits her," just say it. I promise I'll smile back.

See you soon

Your Nicole